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Thursday, January 29, 2009

Twitchy

Run hands through hair, smile shyly, take a step back and then fiddle with the paper in right hand.

Oh man, I had about three good blog topic ideas and four or five lame ones; my body aches from the first hour-long ride on the big lanky gelding in over a month, followed by a day of painting ceilings; I am way behind on like, everything; I'm a confused, disorganized mess.

Scratch nose, wish to be elsewhere, push hair out of face.

I put myself on the spot here, I expect a level of performance in general that I can rarely achieve, and I'm getting tired of my own excuses!

Shift to the other foot, rub nose, scratch back of head.

You know, because in my head I have so much energy, so many ideas, that I could fuel this blog and a novel as well as countless lesson plans for any horse and rider combination, not to mention a column in the church newsletter, some disjointed poems, a few short stories and emails that may or may not make sense.  

But, in real life, I'm really tired and my muscles ache... I wish the studio could magically finish itself so it can make us a living instead of depleting us... and I don't know what to do next.

Lean forward, try not to crack a grin about the absurdity of all this.  Lean back.  Crack half a smile.

Examining the landscape inside my head is like watching Johnny Depp present an award on live TV.  Nothing ever stands perfectly still.  It's quite awesome and beautiful but also kind of disheveled.  

Scratch nose, raise an eyebrow, shift to other foot.  Repeat.  

6 comments:

Kerri said...

But the studio looks fantastic. Almost as good as him.

Heidi the Hick said...

Thanks- that's a worthy goal to achieve, eh?

pseudosu said...

You give the BEST Johnny color commentary around! Totally vivid.
(Actually, I was picturing your own cute self digging your toe around in the dirt like that.)
Take care of you-- remember how important that is.

Heidi said...

the fact that you can smile a bit through this... You're doing good.

And when you're riding and writing, you can't spend all that time with Jethro. So there.

mugwump said...

I can dance in my head. Really, really good. I dance so well people stop and stare, stricken into silence from my awesomeness. In my head.

Heidi the Hick said...

Oh yeah man, in my head I'm pure awesome.

Plus I have a sharp and witty sense of humour which, man, you gotta have, because if you don't, YOU WILL NOT LAST IN THIS BIZNESS!

What business? Heck pick one, I got lots.